bones

skin longs to be
against skin

and flesh
against flesh
(the eternal desire)

but bones, bones
our bones
reunite

only in the grave.

bluebird

i am the innocent misled bluebird
that tried to fly inside the house one year
& was cruelly denied by a fresh & sparkling window.
stunned
because all he wanted was to explore his world
a little deeper.

it's not so easy, being an adventurer
but i'll pick myself from the gravel
& fly again.

aventura

...the realities (some delicious, some harsh) of our dreams are in the tiny details, the ones you can only see when they get right up in your face...

i set out tomorrow, along with two dear friends, on a grand adventure. we will ride our bikes to canada, bringing guitars to play in the streets for food money, stealth camping or couchsurfing by night, pedaling on to whatever the road may bring by day... this will last through the end of july, if all goes according to plan / desire and i am indeed accepted to volunteer for invisible children, in which case i'll be flying to san diego at the beginning of august.

you can follow our trip over at the three busketeers, our trip blog. it has an interactive google map, pictures, writing contributions from all of us, and of course a DONATE button! :) we don't have very much money.

during this journey i will be writing as much as possible. every single day. taking into account every detail of the Life inside and outside of me. some of that may find a home on this blog, maybe, maybe not.

i hope that you find peace in your heart

i hope that love will touch you

i hope that you realize the beauty around you and marvel at it

i hope you are filled with Life.

“What is the feeling when you're driving away from people, and they recede on the plain till you see their specks dispersing? -it's the too huge world vaulting us, and it's good-bye. But we lean forward to the next crazy venture beneath the skies.” - Jack Kerouac, from On the Road

the truth about geysers / the subterranean tango

somewhere, deep, underground

there is a hallowed dancefloor where i tango with my one true love

we are subterranean dolphins doing backflips in the dirt

and when we come to the surface

to breathe through the eyes in our backs,

they call it a geyser.

we may be Old but we will be Faithful

until the muddy end.

the price

painted steel & wood frameworks arch high into the blue
rush of wind and whirr of rollers on twisted tracks

the masses curse the length of hot sweaty zigzagging lines
that they paid the price of a dozen meals to stand in

i want to lose my voice screaming
but not while a child loses her voice permanently!

starved

& her mother's parched vocal cords no longer can sound the pained melody
of the mourning song
you could barely hear it,
the city's rumble-grumble of greed
drowning her out

along with me, and you, and the screams
the click-click-clack of the coaster track & rush of wind
drowning her out

pushing past the site of her grief
to secure our place in line
for a thirty second thrill

rolling to a halt all dizzy and just in time
to buy a ten dollar sandwich and curse
the price.

may seven

the river flows buena onda
smooth beats the rhythm of my essence
and sprained ankles can still tap to the music...
living, it's a flow, it's love
it's a piano played for the audience of the universe with nothing but joy the reward
it's laughter & desire, thanks
to the spirit that moves in me and you and her and him
makes us all DANCE
holding hands in a rainbow circle of the soul green grass in our toes...

freedom comes from the inside
it's what bows the violin of an Auschwitz musician
it's the pen of the drafted poet in boot camp
and every man seeks what he has already
deep inside

some say that the effect of closing one's eyes is a temporary blindness
but the truth is
to look within is to zoom out panorama widescreen
and the whole world lies in a single human heart

my heart aches

to be with those with whom i have once connected on that soul level
the ones with whom i've shared beautiful moments, beautiful but fleeting
be it weeks, days, or hours, our time was short
and one or both of us was forced by circumstance and distance to return to our separate lives

CJ in Harrisburg... you became like my sister in only two sleepless days and nights, living radically to save lives, walking around in the city barefoot at 5AM & laughing
Diana G, wherever she is... music & the love of life brought us together the evening of valentines day
Abi, [insert higher power of choice] knows where you are, other than in my fondest memories, i wish we were still in argentina reveling in freedom and joy, snowboarding, drinking local beer and dancing to reggae
George from ? who I talked to about life on the Capitol steps for hours in the middle of the night... you told my your stories and i told you my plans and we smiled because we knew we were kindred spirits even though i think you're thirty years older
Johanna... i miss laughing deeper than anything with you & protecting you from guys twice my size in the club, and hiking up Cerro Otto & i know that you are my second sister
Heloisa in Brasil, peaceful teacher and soul-mentor... we danced and meditated and shared our wisdom and love in broken spanish & it was so beautiful...you welcomed me into your home and heart like none other...

all of these hold pieces of my heart & they are scattered across the globe. of course there are those with whom i am still with geographically, and those with whom i have been able to commune with for years of our lives, and i do not discount them in the least... however, in this moment my collective yearning is for these beautiful people whose physical existences were aligned with mine for only a short time...a flash in the vastness of time and space but each moment was a star a shooting star and may it be that we may see one another once again and dreams of stars will turn into smiling eyes.

connection is magical. when we feel so ALIVE and everything is beautiful because our souls reach out and hug each other's. we know the truth of life without knowing or needing the words for it.

and now i will hobble back to my room resting in the knowledge that it wasn't all a dream. every wonderful experience, transcendental moment, loving encounter, beautiful life-filled time that i have had has always seemed so surreal when looking back on it, almost unbelievable like i saw a movie through my own eyes... and it's always accompanied by some kind of pain, i suppose because what was once is no longer... it's a good pain, it's the ache that reminds us we are alive and it's buried deep in the chest where our faithful hearts keep pumping the blood that lets us live on for another day of seeking life & love & a soul to connect with.